The reasoning behind the ban, according to the NFL, is the newly coined “Taylor Swift Effect.” The effect, puzzling scientists and statisticians alike, denotes a mysterious phenomenon where anything the popstar touches turns to media frenzy, overshadowing all adjacent events, including an entire sports league known for its voracious and dedicated fan base.

Swift’s publicist released a statement in response to the surprising decision: “While Taylor is admittedly powerful in the pop culture sphere, attributing a drop in NFL ratings to her presence is both ludicrous and scientifically unfounded.”

Despite the seemingly rash blame placed upon Swift, a deeper dive into the logic of the NFL reveals a wellspring of considered (though entirely speculative and uncorroborated) reasoning.

For starters, NFL officials argue that Swift’s connection with Kansas City Chiefs’ tight end Travis Kelce has been stealing the spotlight from the game itself. Fans, they claim, are more interested in glimpsing interactions between the two stars than watching the competition on the field. Moreover, Swift’s highly publicized friendship bracelets, a subtle nod to the potential romantic linkage with Kelce, have been accused of causing more stir than a last-minute touchdown.